when the third type of love arises, then you will be near me.
OSHO, I SEEM TO HAVE FOUND MY QUESTION: THE CLOSER I SEEM TO GET TO MY BELOVED, THE CLOSER I SEEM TO GET TO MYSELF — AND THE FURTHER AND FURTHER AWAY I SEEM TO GET FROM YOU. YET ACCORDING TO YOU, THE CLOSER ONE GETS TO ONE SELF THE CLOSER ONE GETS TO YOU. SO SOMETHING, SOMEWHERE, IS NOT WHAT IT SEEMS. WHAT IS IT?
Let me share one anecdote with you. Henry David Thoreau was dying — on his deathbed. An old friend asked him, “Thoreau, do you believe in the other world, the hereafter?” Thoreau was just going to die, almost on the verge. He opened his eyes and said, “One world at a time brother, one world at a time.”
If love is happening, forget all about me. One world at a time sister, one world at a time.
Sooner or later, what you are understanding as love now, will disappear. But don’t believe what I am saying — go through it. It always disappears; it is just like the dewdrops in the morning. They look so beautiful, and while they last they are — pearls. But as the sun rises, they evaporate and disappear without even a trace behind. Love is beautiful while it lasts. I am not against love; I am all for it. But it is like dewdrops. What can I do? I am helpless.
So while it lasts, enjoy it. At your stage of mind it must be a need: it will fulfil something. Never drop out of it unless you have ripened, unless it disappears of its own accord; and then, don’t complain; and then, don’t feel frustrated. When love, love that you call love disappears, then a different kind of love arises. Only that love can bring you near me.
Right now, the love that you feel can be of two types. Either it can be just a biological attraction of two bodies, feminine and male, yin and yang, positive and negative; of two energies — because they are opposite they attract each other. That is the lowest type of love. Nothing wrong in it, remember, because the lowest love is also very beautiful. And there are people who are lower than the lowest love; there are people, millions of them, who have not even known the lowest love. That is the lowest rung of the ladder.
There are people who are after money; they have not known even the biological attraction. There are people who are after power, politics, and have not known even the biological attraction. It is the lowest rung, but it is still a rung of a ladder which is of love; so, good. It has been called sex; the word has become very degraded, because religions have condemned it too much. I have no condemnation for anything. I am all for using everything, and going beyond. Step over everything and go beyond: every obstacle can become a stepping-stone. Use it.
So either it can be the physical, the biological attraction of the body — then it is sexual. Good, but much more is possible; don’t cling there. Remember:… PROMISES TO KEEP, MILES TO GO BEFORE YOU SLEEP.
Then there is a second rung of the ladder: the attraction of two minds. That is what is called love; the attraction of two minds, the feminine and the male. As bodies are feminine and male, minds are also feminine and male. The male mind is aggressive; the feminine mind is receptive and passive — they fit together. It is higher than the first. The first is almost of the animal kingdom; the second is human. In the first, there can be an oblivion, a forgetfulness, a deep intoxication for a few seconds. In the second, there is much more of poetry, much more of romance, much more of aesthetic sensitivity.
Very few people reach to the second — where the beloved becomes the friend; where the lover becomes the friend. In the first, possessiveness and jealousy spoil the whole game. Possessiveness has to disappear otherwise the second will not be possible. Then you are two fellow-travellers. In the first you face each other; in the second, you both face something else.
For example, if two persons who are attracted to each other’s body are sitting in a full-moon night, they will be looking at each other, holding hands, looking at each other. In the second stage, they may be holding hands, or they may not be holding hands, but they will not be looking at each other; they will both be looking at the moon — a tremendous difference. Now they are being held together by something else higher than both, deeper than both. This second type of love is very beautiful, but still, like dewdrops, it disappears.
If you are frustrated in the first and don’t become hopeless, you then enter the second. If you are frustrated in the first, get so much caught in the frustration, and become hopeless, you never enter the second. Then you remain a body; you never come to know that you are also a mind. In the second, if you are frustrated, as you will be — it has to be so, because the second is not the goal, not the end — if you are frustrated and you become hopeless, then you are caught in the second.
But if you are frustrated and don’t become hopeless, and your search and enquiry goes higher and higher, and you try to see why this love failed… the first love failed because it was only bodily — it could not satisfy the mind; the second failed because it was only of the mind — it could not satisfy the soul: and when the third type of love arises, then you will be near me.
from : Come Follow to You vol.3 ch. 2