Listening means passivity.
Listening means forgetting yourself completely — only then can you listen. When you listen attentively to somebody, you forget yourself.
If you cannot forget yourself, you never listen.
If you are too self-conscious about yourself, you simply pretend that you are listening — you don't listen. You may nod your head; you may sometimes say yes and no — but you are not listening.
When you listen, you become just a passage, a passivity, a receptivity, a womb: you become feminine. And to arrive one has to become feminine.