Love is food: food for the soul…..OSHO
There are only two ways. One is: rejecting, you can remain the same; condemning.
you can remain the same; or: accepting, surrendering, enjoying, delighting, you can be the same. Your attitude can be different, but you are going to remain the way you are, the person you are. Once you accept, compassion arises. And then you start accepting others!
Have you watched it? — it is very difficult to live with a saint, very difficult. You can live with a sinner; you cannot live with a saint — because a saint will be condemning you continuously: by his gesture, by his eyes, the way he will look at you, the way he will talk at you. A saint never talks with you — he talks at you. He never just looks at you; he has always some ideals in his eyes, clouding. He never sees you. He has something far away and he goes on comparing you with it — and, of course, you always fall short.
His very look makes you a sinner. It is very difficult to live with a saint — because he does not accept himself, how can he accept you? He has many things in him. jarring notes he feels. he has to go beyond. Of course, he sees the same things in you in a magnified way.
But to me only that person is a saint who has accepted himself, and in his acceptance has accepted the whole world. To me, that state of mind is what sainthood is: the state of total acceptance. And that is healing, therapeutic. Mm? — just being with somebody who accepts you totally is therapeutic. You will be healed.
As life is…. I divide it in three parts: breakfast, Lunch, supper. The childhood is the breakfast-time. And as it happens if you have not been given your breakfast today, you will feel very, very hungry, out of all proportion, at lunchtime. And if you have missed lunch also, then of course at supper you will be almost mad. Love is food — that's why I divide life in three: breakfast, lunch, supper.
Love is food: food for the soul. When a child sucks at his mother's breast for the first time, he is sucking two things, not only milk — milk is going into his body and love is going into his soul. Love is invisible, just as soul is invisible; milk is visible just as body is visible. If you have eyes to see, you can see two things together dripping into the child's being from the mother's breast. Milk is just the visible part of love; love is the invisible part of milk — the warmth, the love, the compassion, the blessing.
If the child has missed at his breakfast, then when he is young he will be too needy for love — and that creates trouble. Then he will be too impatient for love — that creates trouble. Then he will be in such a hurry for love — that creates trouble. Because love grows very slowly, it needs patience. And the more you are in a hurry, the more is the possibility that you will miss.
Have you watched it in yourself and in others? The people who are too much in need of love always suffer, because they always feel that nobody is going to fulfill them. In fact, nobody is going to be their mother again. In a mother-child relationship, nothing was expected from the child. What can a child do? — helpless. He cannot return anything. At the most he can smile — that's all — or follow with his eyes where the mother is going — that s all. Small, beautiful gestures — but nothing else can he do. The mother has to give, the child has to receive.
If at breakfast-time you have missed this, then you will be looking for a woman who can be your mother. Now, a woman is looking for a lover, not for a son — trouble is bound to be there. Unless by chance, by accident, you can find some woman who is looking for a son — then things will settle; then two illnesses will fit together.
It always happens: a pessimist always finds an optimist to fit; a sadist always finds a masochist to fit; a dominating person always finds one who is in need of being dominated, then they fit. You cannot find two masochists living together, never. I have watched thousands of couples: up to now I have not been able to come to a single couple in which both the partners are sadists or both the partners are masochists. It is impossible to live together — they have to fit. Only opposites fit, and people always fall in love with the opposite.
If you can meet a woman who is in search of a son… that too is ugly, that too is ill, because a woman naturally should be seeking a lover, not a child. And this is the problem, and the problem becomes more complicated: even if she is looking for a son, she is unaware of it; and even if you are looking for a mother, you are unaware of it. In fact, if a woman tries to mother you, you will feel hurt. You will say, "What are you doing? Am I a child?" And you are looking for a mother. Thousands, millions of people are looking for a mother.
That's why man seems so much interested in women's breasts — otherwise there is no need to be so much interested in women's breasts. The interest simply shows that in your childhood, at your breakfast-time, you have missed something. It continues, it hovers on your mind, it haunts you. Breasts are for breakfast time. Now why do you go on thinking and painting .
So just become conscious! If you have some childish attitudes towards love, become conscious, find out, search deep. And just by becoming conscious, they drop. So nothing else is needed. Not that first you have to become conscious and then you have to ask "What to do now?" The moment you become conscious they disappear — because by becoming conscious you are becoming adult.
A child is not conscious. A child lives in a deep unconsciousness. By becoming conscious you are becoming adult, mature, so all that was clinging in your unconsciousness will disappear. Just as you bring light in a room and the darkness disappears; bring consciousness deep in your heart.